Beginning Radio Silence

Tonight's the night! We are flying out first to Amsterdam, then on to Detroit. We will be in the U.S. for nearly all of July (skipping from coast to coast) before Steve returns alone at the beginning of August. The kids and I will try to beat the heat in Washington state for a couple more weeks before returning here mid-August. I doubt that I will have the time, motivation and access to a computer all at the same time, so this will be my last post, until I wake up jet lagged at 2 am when we return.

It's been quite a year - Michael probably had the longest, roughest adjustment of us all, but ended the year on a high note. He is still riding high from the variety show success, and is even making plans to run for Student Council President in the fall (that's my boy!). He started the year with 3 C's and 2 B's, and after a lot of hard work, finished up fourth grade with 3 B's and 2 A's. He seems to have found his niche socially, and we have high hopes for next year.

Jacob started the year strong academically, and finished even stronger. He really hasn't found a "best friend" yet, but has lots of boys calling and asking for play dates (we need to get another phone line and secretary to handle his schedule).

Steve was already pretty much settled in by the time we arrived last August. But we all knew he wouldn't have any issues, didn't we?

So then there's me. I'm feeling very comfortable here by this point as well. I have a good handle on what I can buy here and where to find it. We painted the interior of the house and hung curtains last month, so our house feels more like home than ever now. I have a small circle of girlfriends I know I can count on, and a larger circle of acquaintances I run into every where I go. If Michael starts the year out as strong as we are hoping, I am planning to start taking online classes with the University of Phoenix, still trying to finish that elusive degree. I've enjoyed being active physically here - the yoga classes, water running, the gym, bike rides, etc. And I have thoroughly enjoyed writing this blog. I hope you have enjoyed it as well.

See you in the Fall!

(just a note - I actually wrote this on 7/4, but didn't publish it until 7/7)

The Year in Review - The Good

In the last post I reflected on some of the aspects of moving/living here that disappointed us, or where not what we expected. Let's move on to the positive then...

The Weather
As I am typing this at 10:26am, it is 104 dusty degrees, expected to climb up to 115 by mid afternoon. So to say that the weather is something that we were pleasantly surprised must sound crazy. What we didn't expect, however, is how quickly we would adjust to the heat and most of the time not really notice how hot it is (until the air conditioner breaks). That being said, when I have to go downtown in my abaya (the black gown), I definitely notice the heat! To our amazement, the kids still play outside and ride their bikes - they just come in a lot for water and popsicles. The main reason why I am listing the weather on the positive side is not the heat tolerance issue, but the fact we had at least seven straight months of spring/fall type weather. It was wonderful to be able to have that much time to be able to do outside activities.

Education
We couldn't have been more pleased at the quality of the school here. We found the teachers and staff to be well qualified, experienced and happy to be teaching. The resources were fabulous, class sizes good, the library well stocked, the technology up date and in good supply - there really wasn't anything lacking. We reluctantly left a great public school in Michigan without knowing for certain how the schools here would compare. When you make a gutsy move, it's such a relief when the gamble pays off.

Family Time
One of the major reasons we moved over here was to be able to spend more time together as a family. In the states, Steve took a lot of business trips and worked long hours, including weekends - and when he was around, he had a lot of underlying stress. I was a bit skeptical about the Saudi Aramaco's promised 40 hour weeks and no working on the weekends. I am pleased to say that he always comes home for lunch (along with the kids), truly leaves work at 4pm every day, and has never worked a single weekend. In addition to being able to spend so much more time with us, he has a much better work/life balance.

Socializing
We knew there would be little to do socially outside of getting together with other families. What we didn't expect was how much we would enjoy it. There are no good restaurants around here, whether on camp or in Khobar - but we LOVE to eat, and eat well. What to do? We have the time and relaxed lifestyle to enjoy the cooking together, and sharing it with friends has been a delight. Do we miss other entertainment, such as going to the movies? Yep, but when we do, we head over the bridge to Bahrain and catch one there. And Bahrain does have good restaurants, where we don't dine alone - we usually meet friends.

Close Quarters
My biggest personal positive surprise is the way I feel about living on the compound. Before leaving the states last summer, I'm sure I expressed to many of you my reservations about living in a 10 square mile, fenced community. I feared that I would go stir crazy, feel confined and generally hate it. The reality is that it doesn't bother me, perhaps because I do go into Khobar with either Steve or my girlfriends a couple times a week for shopping. Or perhaps the 10 square miles feels larger than it sounds. I don't know - I just don't think about it really. And the fact is, nothing is more than a 10 minute drive from my house. I can walk to a yoga class and be there in 3 minutes. The pool/gym/restaurant area is a five minute walk and the school is about a 10 minute walk. And remember, of the 10.5 months out of the year we actually live here, it's not too hot to walk to these places. Steve's commute is 10 minutes, even less if he's not going during "rush hour." Thinking back on some of the other places we've lived, where for example it would take 30 minutes or longer to drive the kids one way to soccer practice a couple times a week, the 10 square miles is awesome. Think about how much time we have to do things we enjoy much more than driving.

In a nutshell, there were things that we were definitely disappointed to find here. But the things that really mattered to us, the reasons we came...the family time, the money, the schools, the travel...those things were as we had hoped. The rest we can work through together.

The Year in Review - The Bad and the Ugly

As we get ready to take a break for the summer, I've been reflecting on the last ten months we've spend here in the big sandbox they call Saudi Arabia. What did we originally expect life to be like here? Has it met our expectations? What aspects of this lifestyle have unexpectedly delighted us? What has disappointed us? Has it all been worth it?

When given the choice of good or bad news first, I like to always go with the "bad." I'm not a pessimist, I just enjoy ending on a good note. In that spirit, here is the worst of it: our disappointments, unmet expectations and struggles this year. Tomorrow, I'll end my posts with the "good."

Social/Racial Integrations
Our biggest disappointment is by far how difficult it has been to mix with other cultures here. I'm probably very naive, or at the very least delusional, but I pictured it being a type of Utopia. I thought that we would easily be friends and integrate with people from all over the world. The camp is certainly diverse, but it has just been incredibly difficult so far to cross cultural barriers and socially intermix, particularly with Muslims, on a large scale. And it's certainly not just us. While in the school yard waiting to pick up the kids, one will see a group of white, American women standing together chatting over here, a group of Hispanic women over there, a group of Asians, a group of Muslim moms, and even a group of nannies. Everyone has their friends that they hang out with, and the groups rarely mix. Perhaps it's because you are far from home and it's comforting to be with people who share similar culture, who get what you are going through. Who knows? Whatever the case, it has been very damaging to my hopes for world peace and understanding, and dwelling on it too long makes me depressed.

Arab Majority on Camp
We were surprised when we arrived at the small amount of North Americans who live here. Technically the percentages we were told were not that far off, but we didn't realize how many US/Canadian passport holders were actually from other, mainly Arab, countries. I know that technically nearly all Americans are not "native" to the US, but I'm talking about people that have immigrated within the last few years and don't live an American lifestyle. Not only that, there are more Saudis living on camp than we expected as well. Not a big deal, but you end up with the camp becoming much more "Muslim" than we were led to believe. Visiting Santa ends up becoming called a visit with a "Seasonal Visitor." Trick or Treating in the community isn't advertised widely, and is relabeled "Dhahran Community October Event." A good number of Michael's classmates fasted for Ramadan. And when I go to the clinic, I feel very uncomfortable in short sleeves (I usually bring a sweater to put on when I arrive) amongst all the completely covered women. We expected that "on camp" would be no different that living in the US. Generally speaking, it's true. But not quite.

Tough Groups at the Playground
Next on my list of "bad" surprises...the shocking lack of innocence among the kids here. Not so much the American kids, (I know this will sound prejudiced), but the kids from other cultures, again specifically the Arab cultures. They swear a lot. They are expert insulters. They watch movies and play video games that would shock you. They learn all kinds of things that "we" think they are too young to be learning. It comes down to a difference in culture - to them, swearing isn't a big deal at all, and insulting some one's family, particularly the mother, is just part of trash talking. By just being around them, my boys have lost some of their innocence and learned vocabulary they probably wouldn't have learned until at least middle school. We hold them to a different standard, tell them that in our culture talking like that is NOT acceptable, and try to highlight the way things are interpreted differently by different societies. It's sure a bummer to be having to deal with it so early.

The Time Difference
We had hoped that with our Vonage VOIP (voice over Internet phone) line that keeping in touch with family and friends would make living here no different than living in Michigan. After all, what could be easier than living in Saudi and picking up the phone from a Seattle area code, dialing anywhere in the US (besides actually doing that in the states)? It saddens me to say that while the VOIP certainly made it affordable to stay in touch, it did nothing to help the 7-10 hour time difference we have. The most convenient time to call for both here and the states is after 3pm our time, which is right when the kids are coming home from school. We are, for all intents and purposes, fairly unavailable for lengthy phone calls during those hours - Michael needs our full attention to stay on track with his homework, that leads into dinner preparations, eating dinner, family time, bedtime. By the time the kids are in bed, I'm just not really in the mood for a chatty conversation.

Shopping
While we have been pleasantly surprised at the availability of products, grocery and otherwise, we underestimated how difficult it would be to obtain those goods. Being forbidden as a woman to drive off the compound, I either have to hire a taxi, a private driver or wait for Steve to take me shopping. Yes, we do have a grocery store on camp and for that I am very thankful. However the consistency of stock leaves much to be desired, the variety of goods is fairly narrow, and the prices are high. The better quality food and goods that we are accustomed to are at the Safeway in Khobar, and I can't just shop there without significant pre-planning. On top of the transportation issue, you have to work around prayer time, a forced closing of all businesses five times daily. So yes, I can buy Doritos, Cool Whip, Colgate toothpaste...just not without a huge hassle. I'm glad that details and planning are a couple of my strengths.

Being disappointed and having expectations not met is generally a part of living in a foreign country. We knew there would be a list. However, we would say without any hesitation that the reasons we came here did not end up being on this list - they are on the other one. The hopes that we had for the schools, Steve's working environment/hours, amount of family time, the sense of personal safety, and the ability to travel...the things that mattered most to us...have met and in some cases exceeded our expectations. More on that tomorrow...

Misc. June Happenings

Here's a look at what's been happening in the Green house this month:

We had a candlelight dinner one night, just to liven things up. The kids LOVE drinking out of cheap but real stemware, saved for special occasions. Unfortunately, the sun had not set by dinnertime, so we dined more by natural light than candlelight.

Jake's class had a "Jungle Week" theme, with a very cool paper campfire. (check out Jake posing for the camera - you make have to click on the picture to see it larger.) They were able to bring in camp chairs and jungle animals, and wear safari/explorer clothes. What fun!

The upper grades had their annual "Battle of the Books," a game show based on the books from the reading lists they were given at the beginning of the year. Each class had 5 teams that competed against each other, and the team from each class with the best score went to the "finals" to compete for the title of Fourth Grade Champions. Michael's team went to the finals from his class, and came in 3rd overall.

This fun picture was taken at a large water park in Bahrain.

Michael took part as a volunteer victim for the Boy Scouts First Aid Derby. He took it very seriously and did a great job.

Michael and his piano teacher after the spring recital.

The Al Khobar Branch of Susie Kimball's Store

When asked, "Do you remember Susie Kimball's," I'm willing to bet that at least 95% of you will have no clue. The rest of you will immediately smile with a far away look in your eyes, remembering a time that doesn't seem as long ago as it actually was.

It was a time when Main Street in Sultan, WA was lined with lively, thriving businesses and activities. Although it was a little town of less than 2,500 people, you could find a movie theater, hardware stores, restaurants, shoe repair shops, doctor offices, and a bank. As opposed to the hit and miss service we get today, you would be given exceptional customer service in nearly all the businesses. Any where you turned, you'd be greeted with a friendly, neighborly face, as well as plenty of good ole' small town gossip thrown in for free. And...you would find Susie Kimball's general store.

I can scarcely remember Susie's store - I was still quite a little girl when it closed it's doors for the last time. I do remember that I LOVED going to that store, however. I can picture Susie, her white hair so neatly wound in a bun, standing behind the counter. Looking down, there were creaky, old wood floors that if I recall, were not even remotely level. There were only a couple aisles in the whole place but they were packed with every odd and end you could possibly imagine. My brother and I never felt we had enough time to explore the store - there was just so much to see. If there was anything you needed, aside from grocery and hardware items, you always tried Susie Kimball's store first. Usually, it was the only stop you had to make.

Thirty-five years and 7,324 miles later, I found myself standing in Al Zamil's store in downtown Al Khobar last weekend. I had never spent much time in this store, previously known to me only as the "Michael's" craft store of Saudi Arabia. But that day, in an effort to banish the plain, rented Aramco curtains from our home, I was on a mission to find curtain rods long enough for our two sliding glass doors. To my astonishment, I was told to try Al Zamil's : apparently they had a small hardware section and would cut the rods to your precise measurements (more or less). While I was waiting for my rods to be cut, the three male members of our family explored the four-level store. I made a mental note to try to get everything I needed this on trip - I was sure that the boys would be so bored that it would be a huge ordeal to convince them I needed to return.

I couldn't have been more wrong. When I finally found all of them again, I heard simultaneously:

"This is the coolest store ever!"
"You can't believe all the stuff they have."
"I can't think of anything they don't have here."
"You should have seen the ...(insert any thing)... section."
"I want to come back with my wallet."
"I could explore forever and not see it all."
"Did you see...(again, insert any thing)...?"

And from the tallest one, "Doesn't this remind you of Susie Kimball's?"

After taking my time and looking around myself, I had to agree. It's the most comprehensive, general merchandise/craft store I have seen in decades. Granted, it's about ten times the size of Susie's store, but it's every bit as disorganized, dusty and varied. AlZamil's has everything from fabric...to door bells, craft paper...to science laboratory supplies, custom Styrofoam shape cutting service...to office supplies, spools of ribbon...to nifty key chains, bean bag filling...to Christmas tree lights (yes, in June and in a Muslim country), and every type of glue known to man...to wigs. Mostly "crafty" things I would have to admit, but then you notice something so out of place you have to do a double take, such as Bunsen burners.

In many aspects, I anticipated life to come full circle. I expected to be taken back to my childhood through my boys' eyes on Christmas day. I always knew that one day I would care for my elderly grandmothers, as they did for me when I was a child. I knew when I signed Michael up for piano lessons I would be nagging him to practice, just as I was nagged so long ago. I did not expect to relive the joy of exploring Susie Kimball's store. What a delightful surprise!