Michael's 11th Birthday

Here's just a quick shout out to Michael who had a birthday over a month ago. He wanted everyone to see his cake, and since he didn't have a birthday party I thought I would oblige him.

Yes, you read that right: Michael didn't have a birthday party. It killed me. If you know me at all, you know that I love birthday parties - especially themed ones. I love birthday parties so much that we celebrate the kids' half birthdays (though only with a half-cake, half candles and just one gift: get the theme?).

My Grandma Keck also loved birthdays. It didn't matter how old anyone in the family was, we got together at her house for cake, ice cream, and a horribly out-of-tune rendition of the birthday song.

Sometimes we couldn't manage to meet until a couple weeks after the actual birthday. It didn't matter. Sometimes it was just Grandma, Grandpa, Steve and I. It didn't matter. Most of the time gifts weren't exchanged. It didn't matter.

I didn't think much about it until I had my own little family and Grandma was only a precious memory in my heart. It was just some thing we did, but now it is a part of who I am. Birthdays matter in my home.

So when Michael told me he didn't want a birthday party this year it broke my heart. And why he didn't want one wasn't for the reasons you'd think, like maybe he thinks he's too mature for a party. It's actually quite complicated, with religious, cultural and above all, empathetic underpinnings.

Reason 1: He wouldn't be able to invite EVERYONE and he didn't want to hurt anyone's feelings.

Last year Michael had 5 friends over for a movie night/sleepover party. When he got back to school after the weekend, one of the boys bragged about the party. Numerous uninvited boys were hurt and likely angry that they weren't invited. We all know that it's part of life, but Michael is really sensitive and empathetic and it really bothered him. He carried that guilt around for a year and never mentioned it to anyone until I asked why he didn't want a party this year.

There's no way I'd let him invite the whole 5th grade over to our house, but since we can have free pool parties I thought we could find a way to make it work. Which led us to....

Reason 2: Michael wanted to invite boys AND girls.

We work, learn and live alongside a large number of Muslims. Many of Michael's friends are Muslims. Some of his friends are entering puberty and wouldn't be able to attend a party that had mingling of the sexes (even though they are only 11 years old). His friends would try to come anyway by lying to their parents about where they were going, and might possibly get into trouble. He didn't want to put them in that position. And going back to Reason 1, he didn't want to leave anyone out (by only inviting boys).

I'm not going to comment on other people's religious choices. I'm just so sad that it has to effect whether my son can feel good about having a birthday party. He just refused to do it because he couldn't find a way to reconcile the whole thing.

It really speaks to the kind of heart this boy has. He was completely satisfied with NO PARTY, in order to not hurt feelings or get his friends in trouble. I *love* the person he is becoming.

In the end, we got together with the Neumans, friends we known since we moved to Maryland in 2000. Heidi and Michael's birthdays are a couple days apart and they are the closest thing to family we have here. With no theme to work around, Michael asked me to surprise him this year with a special cake. This picture captured his reaction when he saw it for the first time. He loved it!

Jake's June Piano Recital

The recital was last night - Jake's 2nd ever. It's hard to believe that this kid didn't start taking lessons until last fall. His progress is completely due to his persistence, determination and HARD work. I'd say without any hesitation that he's one of the most goal oriented, focused kids I've ever met.

His performance consisted of three pieces, only two of which his teacher assigned. The third one (Darth Vader's theme - The Imperial March) he just wanted to learn and pestered me until I bought the sheet music off the net for him (remember what I just said about his persistence?). Miss Lydia, as well as his parents, were a bit skeptical about the difficulty of the piece but he proved us wrong. He played it well and we couldn't be more proud of him. After he finished his pieces at the recital, Miss Lydia took the stage for a moment and commented to all about the difficulty of the music he insisted on playing. Unfortunately I had already turned the video off...

Just as a side note you should watch his facial expressions, his lips in particular. What he does when he's focusing is so unique!

Here's the video if you are interested in watching. Family members: you should watch all three - Jake may give you a test when we see you this summer!

I Wish *I* Was in Fifth Grade

I just finished signing yet another permission slip for Michael. This time it's to go bowling and swimming on the 29th of June - the second to the last day of school. I just signed one a earlier in the week giving him permission to go on a field trip to an oil history museum on the 27th. And a couple weeks ago it was one giving him permission to participate in the overnighter (the "lock-in") on the 15th. And this is just the tip of the fun activities iceberg these fifth graders have had this year.

They made GIANT hot air balloons out of crepe paper (think about 5 feet tall) and launched them over the school in January. They actually went up quite high and were retrieved on the other side of the school grounds. I think Michael's group was able to launch theirs three times before it became too damaged to fly again. It was quite an event: the whole school came out to watch the balloon festival.

As I've mentioned in other posts they had a variety show in April. Michael naturally had to participate...

At the end of May they put on a Invention Convention. This one actually involved quite a bit of work, but under mild pressure they will tell you they had a ball doing it. As groups of 3-4 they researched a specific invention, made working models, and gave creative presentations of how the invention worked.

The presentations were set up in a convention format in the multipurpose room, with different booths to visit. The inventions included things such as the diaper, the personal computer, electricity, the zamboni ice machine, cameras, microwave ovens and much more. Michael's group presented Eli Whitney's cotton gin. All day long, younger classes took turns going through the "Invention Convention," and the parents toured it at night.

The fifth grade took half a day off school to attend a middle school orientation and tour earlier this month.

They of course presented a couple performances of the band concert (though all the dress rehearsals got them out of doing math, they say it actually was of a lot of work).

And then there was the "lock-in," which deserves its very own paragraph. This was the granddaddy of all the fun to be had this year. (I can't show you any pictures because parents weren't allowed in!) They started the evening at 6:30pm with the Battle of the Books - a game show type competition based on the 5th grade reading list. By 8:30pm, it had cooled down to about 100F outside, just the right temperature for a massive class vs. class water gun fight on the school lawn. Since they were wet anyway, they declared a truce went swimming at the pool - which is right next to the school grounds. At 10:30pm they had a snack and watched a movie on their mats and sleeping bags, with the sexes segregated, in the gym and the multipurpose room. Supposedly this is when they brushed their teeth (right!). I'm told that lights out was around midnight, but I have no way of knowing for sure.

The next morning a couple of buses took them to the company dining hall for breakfast, then back to the school for the Battle of the Books finals. They came home at lunchtime and didn't have to go back to school after that. What fun! We owe a big thanks to the 5th grade teachers who planned, directed and chaperoned the whole shebang.

As I said before, next week they have a field trip, swimming and bowling. And then the year ends on the 30th with a "clap out," where the kids parade through the school while everyone claps for them as they walk out the doors for the last time. I'm sure I'll be puddle of tears for that one.

I sure don't remember 5th grade being so fun. I think it was just like any other year. As I ponder it though, it's such nice way of making their last year of elementary special, a way to celebrate being at the top of the elementary heap before starting over at the bottom of the middle school heap. Michael has worked really hard this year and I think he deserves every minute of it. I guess I'm just a bit envious.

Catching Up....Again

...I'm sensing a theme here. Clearly I can't manage blogging and taking classes at the same time. Sigh. I have so many topics to blog about now, I don't even know where to start. There's still most of our China trip, all the spring happenings around here, and other random thoughts I've had about Saudi Arabia lately, plus tutorials on the different kinds of palm trees, what are sand roses and why we have 4 different types of water in our house. We are leaving in seven days for our summer trip, and I just don't think I can make it all happen.

How about starting with a quick catchup on the last couple months....when I left you in April, the kids were starting their final trimester of school, I was starting Calculus for spring quarter and Steve was doing what he's always doing (work, golf, read, sleep, repeat).

Michael has been active in Boy Scouts since leaving Cub Scouts in February. We are so, so proud of him. He will be awarded a bronze medal for service hours, as well as advancing to his next rank of Tenderfoot at the Court of Honor this weekend. He's been working hard and is excited about attending his first ever sleep-away camp in a few weeks: Camp Daniel Boone in North Carolina. It's been an emotional month (mostly for mom) as elementary school draws to an end for him, with all kinds of activities to celebrate that milestone. He's had an amazing year - almost too good to be true (particularly on the heels of the train wreck that was 4th grade).

Jake is tearing it up in school too. He's reading a full year ahead of grade level and tops his class in math. He's also finishing up a successful cub scout year with a recent crossover into Bear rank. Jake played baseball again this spring and hopes to make the minor league team in the fall.

...Uh oh...this is sounding like a Christmas brag letter - Yuck! I'm sorry...enough of that! How about a pictorial synopsis instead?

The second grade sold lemonade at recess to raise funds for cancer awareness (they made over $600, at $.50/cup!). Jake was the financial manager for his team, i.e. head cashier. That's him in the blue shirt behind the table.

The 5th grade band concert was last night. Yay, no more nagging to practice the trombone! Seriously though, we're amazed how how far he's come in 9 months with that thing ( I mean that fine instrument).

There's not much explanation needed with this picture. I just think it shows how big he's getting. He enjoyed playing a lot this spring. He's never been much of a baseball loving guy, but in the absence of a good soccer or Tae Kwon Do program, he's had to make do. Steve did a fabulous job coaching the team and now has a new appreciation of coaches!

Michael was so proud to be awarded a pal slip (basically "I was caught doing something Great" type thing), and then even more proud to be selected as the best of the 5th grade, a Super Pal, for the week. Even better was how he earned it: he was the only one who understood how to do a very tricky math problem, and then went around the room explaining it to his classmates. Yay Michael!

Gotta throw in a couple Peaches pictures. She's 8 months old now, and using the dog door nearly all the time. We're going to experiment tonight with leaving her crate open tonight (so that I don't have to get up at 6am to relieve her on the weekend).

Our house boy is going to stay in our home while we're gone this summer to take care of her. She's looking a bit scruffy in this shot, but she has a beauty appointment scheduled for Saturday. We are very happy with her and Jake's health is still holding strong.

Michael had the audience in stitches as the show comedian for the variety show again this year. I have video posted here on Youtube if you are interested in watching it.

He chose Drama-Improv for one of his two electives in middle school. Doesn't that sound about right? We're really excited for him - he'll have a ball!

Scouts have made our life fairly busy this spring, whether it be Cub Scouts or Boy Scouts. Feeling the need to be a contributing member of the group, I volunteered to fill the Quartermaster position for the cubs. Steve has been going with Michael to Boy Scout meetings twice weekly, and helping out on an unofficial basis as needed. With Jake starting his 3rd year (Bear) of out 5 years in Cub Scouts, and Michael still 5 very difficult ranks away from Eagle in Boy Scouts, we have many years of scouting to look forward to.